Please save me
by Rebecke xx
Summary: Bella is at breaking point.When standing at the top of the cliff ready to jump,will a stranger,or maybe not a stranger, pull her back from the life she tried so hard to forget.Will he ever get through how important it is to not just excist but to live.
1. Chapter 1

My toes hung over the edge of the cliff, the waves below crashing against the rocks taunting me to jump with every bang and crash. The dreams, no nightmares, why won't they go away. I'll do anything, I promise I'll be good just please make them go away. The memories creep up on me with a sense of malice and pain that I can't even describe. But I push them away knowing that I won't have to deal with them. Knowing that I will die with no extravagance or attention, just like my life. Maybe if I had just said kept quiet, this would have changed everything, but life is made out of what if's. They all told me I couldn't have known, it's not my fault, and I shouldn't blame myself. But I can see it, the blame behind their eyes that they haven't even bothered to hide. They won't care when I'm gone, I'll just be another name who passed through Forks like a ghost. The gossip of the week before someone hears about the latest affair, I can picture it now "did you hear about that Swan Girl, killed herself"

"Haven't heard of her but did you know Chris and Maggie have been cheating on each other"

"Both of them?"

"Yes."

"No! Wow."

I chuckle darkly in my head. If only they knew, maybe then I wouldn't be mentioned for those 2 seconds. I can't say I'll miss Forks because that would be a lie, but I can say I'll miss Phoenix the place I called my home. Well, before it happened. The trees sway ominously around me, sensing what mood I am now in creating a dark shade surrounding me. With the small patch of bright light to my right, like the cliché, walk into the light. But I can't walk into the light, go back to the world I once knew and loved, because that worlds gone for me. Dead before I could even blink.

If I had been paying more attention I probably would have noticed that the twig that I heard snapping wasn't done by an animal but something larger. I was too focused on the world after the jump than the world before it. Maybe if I had been paying more attention I would have heard the soft steps of shoes behind, but I was too focused on the pain than a footstep. So when a voice came from behind me with urgency and fear I didn't know who it was and instead of stepping of the cliff, I stepped away from it. But the word rang in my head and before I knew it the mystery person spoke again.

"No!"

At the time I wouldn't know how much that person would affect my life, how they would turn it around and make it better again. So I did what I was taught to do keep my eyes to the ground and wait, wait for what I never knew, but normally it was to wait for the worst to happen and then to clean up what was left. After a few minutes of silence I wondered who this mystery person was, why weren't they walking towards me? They weren't even saying anything to me. I slowly raised my eyes at first I saw a pair of black trainers, followed by a pair of jeans and a muscle top. This had taken me a long time considering this person must be at least 6 foot 5 compared to my 5 foot 3 frame. To make matters even better this person was huge, the guys shoulders and arms looked like the size of my head. I kept my eyes travelling upwards until I was met with two piercing blue eyes. But what surprised me were the sadness and the great depth hidden underneath them. No one had ever showed me sadness, sure I had pity and on a rare occasion sympathy but never plain sadness. They didn't even know me how could they be sad.

The man kept eye contact with me for what felt like eternity but I knew it couldn't have been for more than a few seconds. After I realised he probably thought I was staring I quickly directed my eyes back to the floor, waiting for the blow whether it be mental or physical. Slowly I heard a crunch as the guy walked towards me; I knew it would happen soon than later, the sadness was probably faked, so that I was lulled into a false sense of security. But what surprised was the soft hand that pulled my chin up gently so that my eyes would meet his eyes again.

"What were you doing on the edge of the cliff and don't even try and tell me you were admiring the scenery." He spoke quietly and softly to me, the corners of my mouth nearly pulled up into a smirk. Before I had to open my big mouth and say something.

"Great, I had to pick the only cliff with a suicide watch." My eyes widen once I realised I had said this, as I brought up a shaking hand to my mouth to cover up my words I had just spoke.

This seemed to surprise him, as I said this and his hand left my chin as he gasped at what I said.

"That's what you were doing? Committing s...s...suicide?" He said this with a stutter as he seemed to find these words repulsive and unbelievable. After he waited a few minutes and realised that I wasn't going to give him an answer any time soon. He asked the hardest question of all, followed by an answer I already knew.

"What's your name? If I tell you mine will you tell me yours? I'm..."

_Authors note: hey I never read these so I doubt anyone will but if you do, I would like to apologise for saying that I would update my other story, which I never did. I wrote about half of it before I realised it was really hard to write for. Back to this story though, _**CAN ANYONE GUESS WHO THE GUY IS? **_Until next time_

_Rebecke xxx_


	2. Chapter 2

Previously:

"That's what you were doing? Committing s...s...suicide?" He said this with a stutter as he seemed to find these words repulsive and unbelievable. After he waited a few minutes and realised that I wasn't going to give him an answer any time soon. He asked the hardest question of all, followed by an answer I already knew.

"What's your name? If I tell you mine will you tell me yours? I'm..."

Present:

But I already knew his name, the name that I hoped I could call out to in the middle of the night, the name I would repeat after I said I love you. The name I wouldn't ever forget with the personality that morphed into the man standing before me. I can't say it was good when he changed because I was forgotten, I was finally remembered but dropped shortly after, cementing my belief that fairytales belong in books and not in the heart.

As he was about to say his name I whispered it before he got a chance.

"Emmet"

He look as surprised as I did when I said that, but his face then changed into the mask that I had long since hid behind and probably even created. His eyes searched mine quizzically; I believe he was trying to see if he knew me. But he wouldn't of course he wouldn't, like I said I'm just another ghost who floated through and left. He didn't know and never would know of what I did and what happened, even if I did tell him my name and he knew me, he would just probably wonder why I was here.

Some might believe it's my sick sense of humour, others make think I was standing up for myself, but the reason I came up here was to tell the world. Screw you. I can do what I want and no matter what you do, you can't stop me, because how could they, I already did something so unimaginable that would scare even the toughest of guys.

So when my eyes refocused and realised he was no longer staring at my face but my arms I thought it was slightly odd, until I realised that when I came up here I had been intending to jump and feel the rush of the cool air on my skin, on parts of me that were supposed to be hidden, to be kept away from wondering eyes. I had worn a short sleeved t-shirt, but my arms were littered with scars and burns and one word that was etched in my brain until I die, the word carved into my skin. Alone.

"What happened to your arms? Did you do this to yourself? Are you sick? Did someone hurt you?"

As these questions were fired at me, my mouth turned into a grimace, why couldn't I just be left alone, where no one would judge me? From the age of 10 I have always had a cynical look on life, where as some people would say.

"You've got your whole life to enjoy."

I would be thinking, yeh but we're all dying anyway why not end it now, that's why I decided I wanted to die on my 18th birthday because I have had 18 years of living my life but now I have got another 80 running away from it. I don't want to do that, why should I live in a world I was taught to protect when in fact I ended up doing the exact opposite. I couldn't tell anymore whether it was tears running from my eyes and dropping onto my shoes or it was the rain that was starting to mist the view. I was brought out of my musing by a deep yet soft voice.

"Will you at least tell me your name?"

Could I trust him, the first thought that sprang into my mind was no, but again I was entranced by those blue eyes and I felt myself wavering and my mouth opening and shutting like a gaping fish. I wanted to tell him, I wanted to tell him so bad. But it was hard. The question was hard because I had long since forgotten who I was. I had long since forgotten, what being alive truly felt like. Maybe that's why I chose this cliff. Maybe because I wanted to die, or maybe because fate had other plans. This nearly made me laugh but I didn't, I diligently kept my face straight and opened my mouth to utter the word that I hadn't been called in a long time.

"Bella Swan"

I was suddenly met with furious eyes and red cheeks, and then he came storming at me his hands shooting out and grabbing me by the arms before shaking me and telling me something that I had wanted to be for so long.

_Authors note: Sorry for the extra long delay, I'm not going to make up excuses I just had a case of writers block. Sorry. Anyway thanks for the reviews and alerts I got, it was great to hear. Please try and review I really do appreciate them and if you have got any critiques I will happily take them on board. But please don't be to mean. Thanks. Until next time._

_Rebecke xxx_


	3. Chapter 3

"Bella Swan"

I was suddenly met with furious eyes and red cheeks, and then he came storming at me his hands shooting out and grabbing me by the arms before shaking me and telling me something that I had wanted to be for so long.

Present:

"SHE'S DEAD AND YOUR NOT!"

As he said this it didn't escape my notice that his eyes had turned a shimmering blue and the drops of water running down his face wasn't the rain that was persistently falling but from the tears I had been too scared to release. The water I hadn't let flow from my eyes since I was young. Relying only on the rain to show my hurt and pain, by feeling as though the sky was letting me know it was sad to.

Whilst I was thinking about the rain I had forgotten about him. I don't think my mouth could form his name again for fear of breaking down and not being able to piece myself back together. Not having the control over myself again, that's a funny word again. To most it means something happening for another time, for me it meant a time I would have to clutch at me and hold onto it for dear life, because again isn't ever a good thing it's just another way in which someone can take advantage of you.

He looked at me with those shimmering blue eyes and I recited how I knew him, how he changed me into what I had become because he had, there was no small part someone plays in another's life, a meeting will always change someone else, for example: you split coffee on someone, they had to go home in that time and change their shirt, because of that they got to work late and were fired because that was the last straw. We all play major parts in others life but we don't like to take any credit or responsibility for doing so, only when and if it suits us. You don't and will never understand that part you played in mine.

"We met on your holiday, I worked as a waitress in a bar which you liked to come to frequently, you liked me cause you found me... unique I still can't work out if that's a good thing but you pitied me cause you knew something was wrong, you dropped me when it became too much and you left me when you just didn't want to know."

As I said my monologue yours eyes got wider, whilst your shoulders drooped lower. It was odd when I was younger to think of you as anything but indestructible because that's what you were to me, someone to lean on when it became too much. Someone to talk to when I just wanted to leave but knew I couldn't, not yet. But standing here now I realise you aren't indestructible, that even through the muscles and the smile there's a man underneath who knows that what I'm saying is true but can't except the part they played in my life, but it's a step in the right direction because you have acknowledged what you have done and maybe dare I say realise that what I say is true and I am in fact Bella Swan.

But that hope, maybe that's the right word, quickly diminished when I looked into those blue eyes. Without saying anything I always knew what you meant as soon as I looked into your eyes, this was no exception. Your mouth started to form words I didn't want to hear, didn't want to listen to. They were excuses; I always told you I hated excuses because that's all they ever gave me, excuses. I guess that's something else you forgot. It wasn't until I heard the lasts words you formed that my head and maybe even my heart were brought back to the present.

"I'm sorry."

Those two words meant so much, yet so little to me. A contradiction to itself because I knew you were sorry but what were you sorry for, for allowing me to be raped and abused which lead me to do what I believed I had to do or sorry that you saw me again so you had to say something like this.

The funny thing is I'm not even sure you knew. I certainly didn't.

**Hey everyone, well the people who read this story, no excuse I know I haven't updated in a while, sorry about that, I would like to ask for more reviews because if there is anything you would like to critique or anything please say just no saying my story is completely awful cause this has taken time. **

**Thanks Rebecke xxxx**


	4. Chapter 4

"I'm sorry."

Those two words meant so much, yet so little to me. A contradiction to itself because I knew you were sorry but what were you sorry for, for allowing me to be raped and abused which lead me to do what I believed I had to do or sorry that you saw me again so you had to say something like this.

The funny thing is I'm not even sure you knew. I certainly didn't.

Present:

Happiness wasn't every a memory for me, it was a foreign word. Although many strive for happiness and may find it in different mediums of their choice, do they ever find the happiness they truly seek or is it all in vain. When you look back at your life most remember the good, they remember the first time when they were kissed, or that time when they were laughing so hard they couldn't breathe, or maybe the friends that they worshipped. But they don't remember that those so called friends use to tease them until they cried, or the first time they were kissed, just after the guy spread rumours round they were a slut, or when they were laughing so hard they couldn't breathe, they didn't understand that the joke everyone was laughing at was actually about them.

Maybe the mind is a wonderful thing in which you are able to forget that of the times you were hurt and isolated from everyone around you. Yet I, unfortunately, don't have this magical skill of forgetting, that's what it is though, it's magical. Only being able to remember the good is amazing in any sense but I am only able to remember a bad time in which I know I grew up in the world of hate and deceit. Maybe the reason I can't forget is because if I was to forget there wouldn't be anything to remember.

You stand and wait as the world seems to pour around us in the form of water. Your blue eyes twinkle with more emotions than I could ever name, but your eyes still hold the broken promise which you whispered so many years ago that only now you realised was still something I held on to. I now only just realised that your promise was something I held on to, I cherished maybe, hoping one day that you would come back.

Naivety was something I no longer possessed either, when I first met you, I remember you smirking at me when I would say something stupid or get embarrassed by the innuendos you made. I grew up. That's all I can say, I grew up and I changed. I was never normal and yet when I met you I finally thought that maybe I could be, maybe I could have the picture perfect, envious life. Leave the life I lead before and start anew with you without anyone knowing the troubles of my past, not even you. As I said though my naivety has passed.

I stand there for a few more minutes relishing the feeling of your hands around my arm but as I start to see you open your mouth I can't take it. I wanted to scream and shout at the world and ask why it gave me such a shitty hand in life, although this question would never be answered, I was still able to control what was left of my life and I couldn't listen to you say once again you were sorry or give another excuse as to why you left. Because you know what, I didn't care, not anymore; maybe the struggles I had been through had scarred me so much, that's what you use to say, although you never asked what struggles these were, even though I practically was waiting to scream them out.

I wrenched my arms away and caught you by surprise as your mouth formed an O and allowed me to take steps back. Yet they weren't in the direction in which I wanted to go, they were back to the forest. I hadn't realised though as I took my steps back there was a log in the way which I promptly fell over and landed on my bum. Yet you didn't laugh or smile or do anything. You stood and stared, your eyes following every movement I made. I wanted to tell you, make you leave, tell you of the treacherous thing I had done. I wanted to tell you why and not let you think I did it out of spite but out of necessity, out of need.

I killed my Mum.


	5. Chapter 5

Hey everyone,

Right, can someone please review and tell me if it's good or if there's something I need to change anything (please be constructive) I'm sorry I left it so long since last updating I have just found it hard to write.

Thanks,

Becky xxx


	6. Chapter 6

I wanted to tell you why and not let you think I did it out of spite but out of necessity, out of need.

I killed my Mum.

Present:

Humanity, the word we use to describe how we act towards each other. Although I must say many believe that what is now right in the world has become the evil we all see but never tell, no one is exempt from feeling alone in their life. They may be the world's most popular person but they may still feel alone. There will still be a person who talks and hurts that person whether through words, rumours or actions. So I pity them. I am shown only pity in my life apart from anger but the pity is miss directed. They should be turning the pity towards themselves, because all of them can never begin to understand how wrong the world is, they don't even know this world is messed up. Because no one ever sees what we're all doing and no one ever sees anything wrong with the world we live in, so for the most part humanity is idiotic.

Would it be humane to say what I truly felt towards you Emmett, after so many years apart I doubt this. I truly doubt this because underneath my scars and burns and mask, under my hate for you, well there's love and although I can fight it and although I will never be able to tell you again. It's still there and won't go away no matter how much I want it to. But was it humane Emmett to kill my mum, you don't know the circumstances no one does of yet, I barely do myself and I was there, although I felt in my life I was an onlooker to what was happening. That's my question though; I feel that the things that happened to me could even be deserved, although to tell you the truth no matter how many times I replay that day in my head. I always come to the same conclusion; she would have been dead with or without my help.

But I don't let you hear any of this; I lock it away for further wonder in my mind. I'm not sure whether I will ever tell someone any of this and to be honest I think maybe that's the one thing that scares me. I know I won't have to suffer the physical pain any longer, but in the end it didn't cause me much pain anymore since the black welcomed me quicker each time it started. Emotional pain I believe is the worst, it scars and hurts and takes longer to get over it because whatever you do, you won't be able to block it out and forget. Like I said earlier I am not able to forget.

I'm still on the ground staring at you, I stare at you whilst you tower over me yet I'm not scared because you just stand there and stare. Even with the mask that you hide behind I can still see in your eyes the words you want to say. So I wait. I didn't want to hear it before, I backed away and this is where I found myself, on the wet cold ground on the outskirts of the forest. I wait. I wait until you are able to tell me what you couldn't say before, even though I was expecting excuses and maybe even lies, you shocked me. That's hard to do now, I'm prepared for anything now but I wasn't prepared for this.

Your mouth opens slowly and you say the words, I focus on your lips and block out the sound until I realised what you said:

"I was scared"

I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry, you were scared. I found this difficult to understand even though I'm prepared for most things now and I say I'm only scared of my own thoughts. This wasn't always true and when I met you I was scared. I was scared so much but you never asked why, checking my shadow, jumping at someone's voice. All signs I was so scared and yet you thought if you ignored this then it wouldn't be true. So I replied with what I felt you might understand, maybe even make you leave well this was what I was hoping for.

"I didn't think you accepted scared, you ignore me being scared when I feared for my life. So do tell Emmet what were you so scared of?"

You looked at me with heartbroken eyes, but I couldn't look at them and try and understand what you felt. I needed to hear them come out your mouth; I needed to hear you say why. It's maybe closure for me, although closure for me would be to jump of the cliff and land in the icy waters below I highly doubt this is possible with you standing there watching me. So in every good movie and book the suspense built until you finally opened your mouth and revealed what you were scared of. But again, I wasn't prepared.

"I was scared of you"

_Authors note: please hit that little __**review **__button at the bottom, it even helps by saying review this story. So click that and review even if you say two or three words it just says if it's going well or if there's something to improve on perhaps. Thanks everyone for reading this story though. If you have any ideas to add to the story don't be afraid to tell me. I would also like to say that for my first paragraph about humanity I got a few of the ideas about this paragraph from SylvenSilence. _

_Thanks, Becky xxx_


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